|You are striving for a life full of activity and experience, and perhaps what is even more, an environment where you would be able to forge a close bond with a person who can offer full emotional fulfilment.
You don't feel as if you can go it on your own anymore. You don't want to be taken for granted ... You need to be recognised as a "caring person" and it could be that you are searching to establish a relationship, not necessarily with someone new ... but with that someone special who could feel the same way as you do.
You lack confidence and that is a great pity because deep down you are indeed a warm caring person. This lack of confidence is making you wary to be drawn into any open discussion or conflict and so you feel as if you should let matters lie ... and leave well alone ... but there may be a pleasant surprise in store for you. You are beginning to grow .. and very soon - sooner than you believed possible - this warm loving new you will be available for all to see and to appreciate..
You are pretending that the situation around you doesn't matter, but the effort of trying to conceal your emotions and anxieties is resulting in untold stress. The existing situation is disagreeable. You feel unwanted and lonely and you would really like to associate with someone whose ideals are as high as your own. You want to be above the standard of mediocrity... and this need to be needed and that need to need has almost become an obsession. You are trying to magnify the need into a compelling urge. You would really like to tell the world how great you are.. but no.. you are holding back because you feel that your peers may treat you with contempt. This is a great pity because you have in fact a unique quality of character but the continual restraint that you impose on yourself make you suppress this need for others and you pretend you don't really care. You treat those who criticise you with contempt. However, to be honest ... beneath this assumption of indifference you really long for the approval and esteem of others.
You really like doing what you do and more than that, you like yourself. Your attitude to work and to life is that "If its not fun - then don't do it" You want to be liked and respected, not for who you are, but for what you are... and it seems to be working..